Episode 33: If You Think It's Big and Complicated You'll Probably Put It Off

Is there something you need to get done, or want to accomplish... that you keep putting off until "later?" In this episode, I’m sharing why procrastination is really just your brain trying to avoid an uncomfortable emotion—and how to gently outsmart it. You’ll learn how to make things feel smaller, simpler, and more doable—so you can start making progress now, not later.  

And if you want help applying this to something in your life, grab a free mini session at https://www.emilyrickscoaching.com/minisession—I’d love to chat with you!

Full Transcript:

You're listening to the Think New Thoughts Podcast with Emily Ricks, episode number 33. If you think it's big and complicated, you'll probably put it off.

I'm Emily Ricks, and this is Think New Thoughts, a life coaching podcast to help you find more joy in your relationships. In each episode, I'll share a simple idea that will help you see things in a new way so you can love God, your neighbor, and yourself more deeply than you ever have before. If you're ready to literally change your mind, I think you'll like it here.

So I grew up listening to a cassette tape about dependability that had a super fun story with songs, like a mini musical.

So there are two kids, Kate and Reggie, who don't want to return their library books. And when they tell their mom that they'll do it later, they're suddenly transported into outer space, onto a spaceship with Captain Dependable. And he has a catchy little theme song.

Should someone need me, never fear. Almost like magic, I'll appear. I'm not just intendable.

Captain Dependable, that's me. But there's also a sinister villain named Professor Unn, who knows Captain Dependable's weakness, which is procrastinate. And his henchmen are like, procrastinate.

And Professor Unn says, he will put off what he is supposed to do. He will procrastinate. And then his henchmen are like, Professor Unn, you're a genius.

Anyway, so the kids, Reggie and Kate, are about to be captured by Professor Unn, but they can't get Captain Dependable to help because he has succumbed to the procrastinate. So then they have to find Captain Dependable's do it now wafers and get him to eat one. And then they can send Professor Unn and the procrastinate into the deepest, darkest galaxy.

When the kids get home from their spaceship adventure, they rush off to the library to return their books because they've learned not to procrastinate. There's actually 12 of these fun mini musicals for kids. I grew up on the cassette tapes.

My kids had the CDs and now they're available on Apple music. So sometimes we'll listen to them just like as a fun throwback when we're doing the dishes or something. They're called stand and tall.

If you ever want to check them out, super fun. Okay. So let's talk about procrastination today, waiting for a later time to do something important.

Why do we procrastinate on the action line? Procrastination looks like avoiding doing something, putting it off, maybe finding a distraction instead, busying yourself with something that isn't quite as important. So you don't have to do the thing that actually needs to be done. And as a life coach, I believe that any action or inaction is fueled by an emotion.

So some emotions that tend to lead to procrastination are fear, worry, insecurity, overwhelm, or dread. Like when you feel overwhelmed about packing for a trip, you will most likely put off doing it, telling yourself it'll be easier quote-unquote later. Or if your child feels dread about a looming long-term assignment, they are likely to work on other homework or spend time with friends or put off that long-term project until later.

When you feel insecure about giving a presentation or a talk in church or something like that, you might end up putting off outlining it or preparing it until later. Captain Dependable has this super funny song that he sings. Once he's under the influence of the procrastinate, the kids are about to get captured by professor on.

And they're like Captain Dependable, we need you. And he doesn't see the urgency of it at all. He sings later, wait till later.

I will get it done. Just the way you say later, wait till later, but don't make me do it today. So the action of procrastination, putting things off until later is fueled by an emotion.

When you are procrastinating, see if you can find out what the emotion is that's driving that action or inaction. Most often we avoid doing something if we don't like how we feel when we're doing it. So really, when we put off doing something, we're almost always trying to avoid feeling an emotion we don't like.

So rather than avoiding working on the thing you need to get done to avoid feeling insecure or confused or uncertain or overwhelmed, you can actually swim upstream in the model. As I like to say, go up higher than the action line, higher than the feeling line to the thought line and adjust what you are thinking about the project. This will change how you feel about the task and with different thoughts and different feelings, you won't be as prone to avoid the project because you've now cultivated an emotion that will lead you to action.

A new thought and feeling is your do it now wafer that helps you to free yourself from the grasp of the procrastinate. Thoughts create feelings. Whatever emotion you feel is created by a thought.

So here are some thoughts that lead to feeling overwhelmed or insecure or unmotivated, which typically lead to putting off something and saying you'll do it later. Here are some of those thoughts. This is going to be really hard.

This will take so much energy. This is big and complicated. I have to do this all at once.

I don't even know where to start. I'm too tired. I'm so busy.

I don't have time to do it. This doesn't really matter anyway. Or on the opposite of that, this is so, so, so important.

And I have to do it exactly right. And then sometimes we don't even want to get started because there's so much pressure. So here's what I want to offer you.

If you notice that you are putting off something until later, that you keep not doing it first, drop into awareness. Just get curious, like, Oh, interesting. I keep putting this off.

I wonder why. I wonder what emotion I'm trying to avoid. Then see if you can make the project smaller.

See if you can find a way to make it feel easy, small and simple rather than big, hard and complicated. This is one of the best antidotes for procrastination. Here's an example.

The other day I had an impression to reach out to a woman at my church. I believe that impression came from God. Like he was inviting me to bless this woman's life by just showing friendship.

My brain was like, Oh, we need to make cookies or drop off some kind of a gift. And then all the procrastination thoughts ensued. Oh, I don't really have time to do that.

This is going to be hard. I don't know what gift I would even get for her. This is big and complicated.

So then I started to feel some overwhelm and some dread about doing it because who wants to do something that's big and complicated and hard and time consuming. Not me. That doesn't sound fun at all.

I noticed that that was starting to happen in my mind. And so I was able to intercept it and say, Hey brain, this is not big and complicated. It's actually small and simple.

Let's just start with a text. It will take you literally 30 seconds. Just say, Hi, just say you've been thinking about her and you wanted to say hello.

If I had stayed with the big and complicated mindset I had, I definitely would have put it off until maybe next week. And then next week, it still would have felt overwhelming. So maybe I wouldn't have done anything at all.

Making it small and simple made it doable. And this woman didn't get a present or homemade goods, but she did get a thoughtful, very simple, very small gesture of friendship through a text. Here's another example.

I've been wanting to clean out and organize my closet. Every time I think about doing it, I have this feeling of dread. Like it's going to take a long time and it's going to make this huge mess in my whole room.

And I make it into this big and complicated thing. The other night I had something I usually do that got canceled. So I had a few extra minutes and I said, okay, how could I make this closet thing smaller and simpler? I took about 10 minutes and just organized a few things, grouped certain items together, cleared off one shelf and gave away a vest I don't wear anymore.

By doing a small and simple 10 minute microburst, I closed the lid on the procrastinate that was making me want to put it off until later. I did something. And I got a little dopamine hit from that small and simple progress, which made me want to do more sometime soon, rather than just avoid the whole thing.

It felt good to make a tiny bit of progress. So here's the neuroscience of motivation. When you as a human being feel that you're making progress, even just a teeny amount, your brain releases dopamine, a neurotransmitter associated with pleasure and reward.

This dopamine release reinforces the behavior that led to the progress, which makes you much more likely to continue working on the goal over time. Dopamine makes you want to do something more. So if you can do a tiny bit and feel like you made a little bit of progress, your brain will release a little bit of dopamine, which will help you want to make more progress.

Procrastination is what we do when we feel overwhelmed about something. And usually we feel overwhelmed because we're thinking it's big and complicated and hard. So a really effective workaround is to break a big project down into smaller pieces.

Make it so small and so simple that it feels really easy to do. So what is it for you? What are you putting off? What do you need to get done or want to get done, but keep not doing it? You keep pushing it away. Later, wait till later.

See if you can break it down into smaller pieces. I've been putting off getting our carpets replaced. Every year I'm like, well, it's fine.

We can go another year, which we can, but really I feel overwhelmed because it feels big and complicated and like a huge pain to move all the furniture. And so I'm avoiding that feeling of overwhelm by just not thinking about it and not taking action on it. My husband and I decided in January at our marriage retreat that this is the year for the carpets to be replaced.

So I'm committed. We're going to do it, but in order to make progress, I will need to break it down into really, really bite-sized steps. Like step one, spend five minutes doing a Google search of three possible companies.

Step two, text two friends for recommendations of who they used. Step three, schedule a free quote with one of the businesses. I don't have to break all my projects down into this small of steps, but for this one, in order to get myself going, I'm going to really have to break it down.

So when you notice you feel overwhelmed or confused or unsettled or feeling like that about a big project and you're putting it off and not taking any action, see if you can identify just the next action that would help you move forward. Something that will take 10 minutes or less. And then tell yourself, this is going to be easy.

I can do that tiny, easy, simple thing. That'll just take 10 minutes. That's how you leverage the power of your thinking to close the lid on the procrastinate.

Big and complicated is the enemy of progress because if it feels big and complicated, you're probably going to put it off. Break it down into teeny tiny pieces and choose to believe that it's small and simple and easy and see what happens. By small and simple things are great things brought to pass.

You, my friend, were meant to do great things. Don't make it big and complicated. If you've ever listened to something on this podcast and thought, that sounds amazing, but how do I actually do that in my life? You're not alone.

That's why I'm now offering free mini coaching sessions. Whether you're just curious what coaching is like, or you want a little help applying something you've heard here to your own life, I'd love to talk with you. If you want to hear more about what it's like to work with me, we can chat about that as well, but I'm also happy to just help you think a new thought or two.

One of my clients, Hannah, messaged me after a coaching session a few months ago and said, you feel like my brain chiropractor. I don't think I'm out of alignment. And then you adjust how I'm thinking with a few words.

And when I walk out, I realize how much pain I've been in. That was one of my favorite compliments ever being called a brain chiropractor. You can sign up for a free mini session at www.emilyrickscoaching.com/mini-session.

So if you want a little mental adjustment, let's talk. I'd love to meet you. Thanks for joining me today.